I hate whining. Especially from leaders. I’m not talking a mild dislike either. I truly believe that whining is the most unproductive use of anyone’s time, especially in a business setting. I sometimes describe whining as taking your dirty laundry hamper out of your closet and spreading the contents across your front lawn. You’ve successfully identified the smell, but you’ve also shown it to the world and the clothes aren’t any cleaner than they were before. So what does this have to do with limiting your career?

There is a big, but subtle, difference between discussing & addressing a real issue (e.g. a broken process, a human resources issue, a customer issue, etc.) and whining. Without some self-inspection, your leadership may view you as a whiner instead of a problem solver. If you are a leader, or an aspiring leader, this can be disastrous to your upward mobility.

Don’t Bring Me Solutions

I once heard a speaker comment on the management adage, “Bring me solutions and not problems.” He said it might be the worst thing a leader could ever say. I tend to agree. If you don’t have a common understanding of the problem, how can you come up with a solution. Have you ever noticed how quickly people jump from discussing the problem to defending their position? Sadly, they never agreed what the problem was to begin with. I know what you’re thinking, “But, you just said whining about problems is career limiting.” And whining is. But, healthy, productive problem/solution based discussion is not career limiting.

Four Mistakes that Turn Problem Solving Into Whining

1. Playing Victim – When you play the victim, you assume that your position is automatically correct and the “other side” has caused some injustice to you. It allows you to avoid responsibility by forcing it on the other party. This is not good leadership behavior. Sometimes you have to compromise, admit your own contribution to the issue at hand, and work out a mutual solution.
2. Preaching – Passion is good leadership quality. However, if you go around telling everyone how to fix their problems, and how they can do their jobs better to avoid X issue, then your passion is misguided. A healthy admission of your (or your organizations) own weaknesses and challenges can help give you perspective.
3. Editorialism – Yes, I made this word up. It really means beating a dead horse. Sometimes there are issues that everyone knows exist. Those issues are usually systemic, like there is a senior leader in the wrong role, wreaking havoc on a group. When these types of issues exist, people don’t want to hear about it every time an issue pops up. Some people feel obligated to re-hash the issue in every conversation. It’s not productive – everyone knows the issue exists, and chances are, they are working on it. Don’t think more highly of your own critical thinking than you should.
4. Tossing Grenades – Don’t shirk your responsibilities. If you caused an issue to happen, stand up take some responsibility. Don’t try to find loopholes in the process to pass the blame to other people. Some people are very good at gaming the system and playing politics to avoid blame for issues when they arise. Instead, be an equal participant in the problem solving process with everyone involved and don’t point fingers.

We all subconsciously know when we are complaining and when we’re truly trying to address the issue. If you can be a common denominator and help others solve problems, you will do well as a leader. Have you ever seen the consequences of someone constantly complaining about issues on the job?

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